passion killer, you're too much
by coffee-stained lips
Summary: There's no Beck, there's no Jade, there's only Beck&Jade, one entity, and Robbie's trying to squeeze in but he knows he can't. / Jade&Robbie&Beck, the full cycle. Oneshot.


**a/n: :/ so. i wanted to write a jaderobbie, then a beckrobbiejade threesome, and then i got just a beckrobbiejade love triangle.**

**yeah...i don't even know either. blaaaaah, but all three ships are soiogbrdff _awesome_. and this is oetvecegr _crappy._**

it's in the way her fingers curl around his under the sheets & in the way his hair tickles his forehead in sleep. it's in the way she kisses hotly with her hands tearing at his curls & in the way he puts his teeth into his neck.

she's gorgeous with brightbright electric blue eyes and cotton candy hair & he's handsome with bangs that hide his face and a wry smirk that doesn't match his eyes.

it's why robbie loves them - and why he can't.

.

for two seemingly different people, they're very similar.

jade is more passionate and beck is gentler, but they both like to chew at his neck and play with his hair. in the mornings after they both make coffee (two sugars, no cream), even though beck's the only one who offers to make him some, and they both prefer _full house_ to _pokémon _during those (rare) nights that he just lies with either one of them and breathes their air - and they breathe the same, through it all and after, when they're asleep - like they're two souls joined together, tethered by some invisible string.

and robbie's in the middle, with scissors that are much too dull to cut through it.

.

"beck doesn't need to know," jade hisses to him between inserting her tongue in his mouth.

_oh, but he does_, he thinks, kisses her instead.

"jade doesn't need to know," beck whispers, toying with one out-of-place curl.

_oh, but she does_, he thinks, presses his nose in his chest instead.

(_tethered by some invisible string_.)

.

he's not sure who he likes better.

jade is rough and mean to him, throwing insults left and right, but in her eyes he sees there's something, and he feels that something in her touch when she's asleep, when her hand finds his under all the blankets.

but beck is sweet and tender, even with the sarcastic jokes, and his grin is so beautiful that robbie can't help but want him, want him to be - be _the one_.

(but to beck, jade's _the one_, and vice versa, and robbie's a plaything for when they're bored.

rex tells him _keep dreaming_ when he thinks maybe either could love him back.)

.

sometimes, he falls asleep with rex's voice chanting _you're sick_ in his brain.

other times he hears jade or beck's breathing with it (and it only reminds how sick he really is).

.

rewind, rewind, play. they're at some sleazy senior's party. there's booze and powder on the floor, and the music is too loud, and nobody takes care to be quiet in the bedrooms.

he kisses jade first - or is beck? everything's all a blur, with jade&beck and beck&tori and robbie&nobody, but it doesn't matter because they taste the same (like alcohol & drugs & each other) and they touch him in the same spots with the same hands (they're different, they're the same).

(there's no beck, there's no jade, there's only beck&jade, one entity, and robbie's trying to squeeze in but he knows he can't.)

.

he tells jade "i love you," in her bedroom, where the moonlight can't see through the silk-satin curtains.

she tells him to shut the hell up, and slams his head against the bedpost.

& he tells beck "i love you," in the backseat of his car, where the moonlight is too overbearing, he can't see beck's face.

beck stares a moment; tells him no, rob, and then knocks his head against the car window.

(he throws up both times, but not from the headaches.)

.

"you're not that bad, robbie." jade mumbles, scratching at her chipped nail polish, and he crawls up from under his pikachu bedspread.

"really?" he says, and she looks at him, earnestly and almost pityingly, and he's not sure whether to feel good that she cares, or bad that the caring equals pity.

"sure, whatever." she says.

they lie against the pillows and watch the sun rise.

.

"pikachu?" beck laughs as he flops onto robbie's bed. "that's why i like my rv better."

"i like it too." robbie says (because there there's safety & no little sisters that his parents like better & no pools of blood in the bathtub from his mom).

beck's smile falters. he crawls across the bed and kisses robbie tenderly. robbie stumbles, keeps kissing.

"you taste pretty good," beck says, "for a dude."

robbie's on cloud nine when beck drags him under the sheets.

.

fast-forward four years (five? six? he doesn't care to remember anymore), play. beck gets on one knee, and jade says yes.

(well, _whatever, if you're that desperate_, but it's close.)

robbie's there, on the park bench, and cat and tori from beside him squeeze his hands excitedly (even though tori's a little in love with beck & cat's a little in love with jade, but they're not dirty like _him_). everyone hugs them, says congratulations, and robbie watches.

that night he does it with them both - twice.

(how's that for a fricking congratulations?)

.

he would rather them not be married when he does this because their rings dig into his skin and rest beside teethmarks so he has to see them there, etched on his skin, worse than the words _dirty liar_ painted on his flesh.

(and they look so pure in suit & tie and long wedding dress, and robbie doesn't even get to be best man, just the rotten scumbag who watches their hips graze during the first dance and remembers how he fits with them both.

hey, at least he doesn't have to buy them a toaster.)

.

"i think i could be in love with you," beck says out of the blue.

robbie feels like he should be happy, isn't. "but you're not." it's a statement, not a question.

beck turns the volume on the tv higher.

.

"hey, robbie?" jade says, and he looks at her from behind his notebook, and her eyes aren't mean or judgemental anymore - they're concerned, they're fearful even.

"yeah?" he prompts, because he can read it in her expression, what she's going to say, and he doesn't want her to say it.

she bites her lip. "never mind."

they make out on his kitchen table.

.

they have a daughter, beck and jade (beck&jade) - angela, and she's got her father's dark starry eyes and her mother's light brown hair. but she wears glasses & writes music about toads and fingers, and it makes robbie want to throw up when she calls him _uncle robbie._

"uncle robbie," - sting, burn - "i love you."

hesitation, fake smiles. "back at you, kiddo."

"daddy loves you too." she says.

robbie sees beck out of the corner of his eye; beck's not looking at him.

"so does mommy." robbie looks at jade; she isn't either.

"i think they love you more'n they love each other." she whispers, and robbie thinks he sees them both twitch. he helps angela color in the kitty-cat on the page with a purple crayon.

"but don't say i said that. they don't like to talk about you."

_i'm not surprised, _robbie thinks. he tells angela he has to go home a few moments later, and neither beck nor jade visit him that night.

.

"i don't think we should do this anymore." jade says point-blank one night.

she leaves him with a hickey on his throat and half his heart in her pocket.

.

"we ought to stop, rob." beck says from robbie's front porch step.

they do it one last time in the rosebushes, and robbie has a scar from the thorns on his chest and the rest of his heart in beck's glove box.

.

"uncle robbie," angela whispers to him when her parents are in the kitchen. she's still wearing her graduation dress, all glittery and sparkly, and her contacts show off her darkdark eyes.

"yeah, kiddo?" he says, and suddenly he notices just how tan her skin is, just how dark her eyes, just how brown her hair is, just how unique her voice is, and it all reminds him of a girl and a boy, a beautiful girl and boy, and he feels heart unhinge from his chest and plummet to his stomach.

she kisses him hard, pressing him against the wall, and she tastes like an eighteen-year-old beck&jade did once, sickly sweet and like temptation. "i love you," she whispers into the shell of his ear.

for the first time in years, he kisses someone back, and it doesn't feel like an ending.

**a/n: o.o yeah...wtf on the end, i feel the same...please don't think i don't think that's _kind of_ gross, I just felt it was needed. the end's kind of inspired by, of course all those lilyteddy stories I read from _Harry Potter, _and from camilla monet's _my sin, my soul_, which is sinisterly appealing, i'd have to say...so, thanks for reading, i guess. not sure what to end this with.**


End file.
